The Top 5 Worst Relationship Advice Given To Me About Love

Have you ever noticed that when you are either on your very first “barely hit puberty” crush, your tenth boyfriend/girlfriend 2 years out of college or your third marriage that the “experts” have ALL of the answers??  Yea, me too!  I do not even remotely pretend to have all of the answers, but in my 35-ish years of relationship experience, I have learned a LOT.

I asked my husband and one of my sons what do they automatically think of when being asked for relationship advice and this is SOME of what they came up with…….Some I couldn’t publish because I am trying to keep a semi- G-rated blog here.  In fairness, I did laugh pretty hard at what they said but I attribute that to having a sense of humor that was severely stunted in growth by getting married VERY young and raising 3 boys and having been married a few times.  Essentially my sense of humor can be equated to an 8-13 year old boy mixed in with a nifty side of post menopausal wicked and there you go…..If Bart Simpson and Betty White had a baby – BAM!  That would be my sense of humor spirit baby 🙂

So, let’s get to it.  Here is my list of the TOP 5 worst relationship advice I have ever gotten…..

1.) Don’t go to bed angry –  Sometimes in my world that has seemed like such a tall order…..don’t go to bed angry….but what if (fill in the blank with whatever irks you to no end) that happened and I want to be angry?????  Going to bed angry is what you might choose in the moment and if so, that’s your choice but it seems a bit unfair when your significant other is left with a feeling of being inadequate or sad, so instead of just not going to bed angry, be angry if you want to be BUT the advice given by a couple that has been married 76 years is, it shouldn’t  matter how angry or sad you are, you don’t have to say anything but you always, always touch toes. It’s just a little reminder that I’m here and I still love you no matter what…….

2.) Love is blind – There are a lot of people who would argue this is true for those involved in the relationship but the truth is that those AROUND the relationship are not blind.  They don’t have a “dog in the hunt” so to speak so carefully and methodically  consider their input.  Consider that if nobody likes your partner, there may be good reasons for it. So if your loved ones have lots of reservations, don’t get defensive but listen to why they feel that way and then make up your mind.

3.) Don’t play games  – Really???  Oh yes, yes I say, do play games!!!!  Probably not the kind that you may be thinking but how about a good old fashioned game of Monopoly, or Cards Against Humanity, or the best yet “What do you meme“…..When you play a real game with someone you get a chance to observe how they  behaves under stress, whether they’re honest, how they handle those embarrassing topics, and how they handle defeat.

4.) For women – “go for the strong silent type” – While that theory may work when we want to binge watch The Bachelor or in my case The Food Network but research finds constant communication is the key to a lasting relationship. Don’t just talk about if you want to have kids—discuss how you will raise them. Talk about money—how you plan to afford things and when you want to retire. Then, once you’re married, communicate when you’re happy and unhappy, what feels good and what doesn’t, what turns you on and off. Don’t just talk about “surface” things, say what is there and do it with love 🙂 If the conversation doesn’t go the way you want it to, then touch toes……..At the end of all of this the sentiment is still the same “I love you no matter what”

5.) Don’t hang wallpaper together – I always found this advice rather odd….I thought it meant to literally not hang wallpaper together but then I realized that it meant, can you do the crazy hard things together and still laugh?  To me that is the TRUE mark of a great relationship…the fact of the matter is we all have to do the most mundane and sometimes not so pleasant things in our lives but if you can find someone who makes you laugh then you are golden!!!!!  The flip side is be sure that you find the same things funny or at least relatively close……If he thinks a whoopee cushion is funny and you don’t, it certainly won’t get funnier for you 30 years from now. I promise…….

So,now that I have gone over what I think is bad advice, let’s talk about what is my go to top 5 best advice that I would give anyone in a new relationship:

1.) Live -Live your truth.  Whatever or wherever or with or without someone or whatever else you can think of, just do you!!!!!  Just do you!!!!!  Some of the best 3 words in the English language is just do you……

2.) Laugh – ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS have a sense of humor (yes even a Bart Simpson/Betty White sense of humor works)  I have told my husband many times “make me laugh and you have me at HELLO”.

3.)Love – Simply said, love hard love often.  I don’t know if anyone else has had this experience but the older we get the faster things go…..we don’t know when our first day of something or last day will be so just love hard and love often and most importantly, LEAVE NOTHING UNSAID…….

4.) Eat – Food is love.  It really is just that simple.  Let me say it again….Food is love.  Feed your soul and feed your body.  Those 2 ideas are not mutually exclusive of each other either….Read my post “Fredericksburg – Our Way” and you will see how we were feeding our souls by getting out of town and away from work and also feeding our bodies by having the BEST hamburger in Texas at The Pig Pen in Albert TX.    Food is love……

5.) Everything in between – I know it sounds corny to some but embrace everything that is “in between”.  Is it annoying sometimes that you come home to dishes in the sink or dog hair everywhere, laundry not done, or dinner not cooked but I go back to rule #3 and love what is there for you because tomorrow may be very different…..and it could be in a great way or a not so great way….You choose!

Be safe out there and be kind to each other!!!!

Fredericksburg Texas – Our Way

It had been a rough couple of weeks with work crisis’s, local and national tragedies, family issues, etc… when Scott innocently  said “how about we go to Fredericksburg in a few weeks for the weekend”…….Admittedly my husband is very thoughtful (Shhhhh…don’t tell anyone!!.  I would not want to ruin his image) but I was immediately suspicious………..

With just a few keystrokes it became clear to me what his ulterior motive was 🙂

Garrison Brothers small bottle release and party!!!!!

Garrison Brothers is a Bourbon Distillery in Hye Texas and my husband swears by their bourbon.  I do not like Bourbon (I know, GASP!) but we have figured out that a weekend getaway to Fredericksburg works for both of use because we go the wineries for me and the distillery’s for him and at the end of the day, we both are adequately “relaxed”(translation – buzzed), we get to enjoy good food and we always find a little something to take home with us.

Take a look at our most recent purchase….A farmhouse style clock that we proudly displayed above our bar cart.  It’s 5 o”clock somewhere!!

IMG_2392

Purchased at EWay Furniture Store on Main Street in Fredericksburg

I immediately texted some friends of ours who LOVE wine too and a plan was hatched.  We spent 3 days there, including 4 hours of drive time each way;  the weekend was packed with many different varieties of wine, bourbon, rum and great food but here are a few favorites from the weekend:

There is one place that deserves a special mention – I had mentioned to Scott on the drive down to Fredericksburg that I had been craving a really good burger – NOT the fast food kind, but an all beef patty topped with cheese (lots and lots of gooey cheese), onion and pickle and everything else that is good in this world……so, as we were nearing the point where we needed food to absorb all of the alcohol – I mean as we were getting hungry we asked one of the distillers where could we get a good burger and he simply said “The Pig Pen”.  It is a simple food trailer parked on the lawn of the Albert Dance Hall but their food is anything but simple.  I ordered a burger (DUH!) and what came out was nothing short of a masterpiece!!!  It was an all beef patty that had the most amazing salt crust on it and it was HUGE!  It was topped with the freshest lettuce, onion and homemade pickles and cheese and when I bit into it the juices ran down onto my hands – it was PURE NIRVANA – so much so that we went back the next day and ordered another one.  The owner said he specialty is pork and Scott had a pulled pork sandwich that was glazed with BBQ sauce that we combined with Garrison Brothers Bourbon…….Can you imagine???

Seriously, if you hear nothing else, hear this – go to Albert TX and more importantly, the Pig Pen food truck and order the burger – you are welcome!!!!

PicMonkey Collage

Alas, all good things must come to an end and we are home.  After I get done mourning not having a longer weekend, I will settle back into the daily grind we call “work” and will dream of a day in the very near future where we will be able to get away again to my heaven away from home.

Be safe out there and be kind to each other!!!!

Instant Pot – 2, Failure – 0

Instant Pot It happened!!!!  Yes, I got my Instant Pot…..well 2 to be exact but that is a story for a different day.

What I will say is that I ordered one from Amazon Prime (remember Prime=hero!!!) and while we were waiting for it to be delivered we heard through the grapevine that the Kroger in Wylie had them for $40.00 less that what I paid for it on Amazon so away we went…We arrived at Kroger and walked the entire store before we found a promising aisle in the middle of the store in the “kitchen gadgets” section. (I know, duh!) There was a young girl restocking things and we couldn’t find the pots at first so I asked.  She pointed to one on a baron shelf and said it was their last one………C’mon now!!!!!  Do you honestly expect us to believe that this is the last Instant Pot in all of Kroger’s infinite inventory of all that is holy????? Of course it isn’t!!!!  So, as I tucked my head and tried to rub the word “Sucker” off of my forehead, I grabbed the box and ran (not walked) to the checkout line….I had already purchased enough food to feed a small army and couldn’t wait to try this amazing “change your life” aparatus…….

I then got home and already started experiencing remorse…NOT because of the Instant Pot but more worried that I had just spent a small fortune on food and what if I tried to use this device that potentially requires a masters degree to use and I wasted all of that amazing food????  Despite my normal fly by the seat of my pants attitude, I decided to dial it back and start small……..

I used an old, stone age technique called a cast iron pan and made sesame stir fry beef…I decided to use the Instant Pot to make some Jasmati rice and although it takes patience and the reading of directions MULTIPLE TIMES the rice was PERFECT!!!!!  It really was as simple as adding water and rice to the Instant Pot and 4 minutes later we had perfect rice…..

Needless to say I was impressed!!!!!  In fairness I have to say that the rice stuck a little to the bottom of the pot but nothing that couldn’t be remedied with hot water and a quick scrub…..

With everything turning out the way it did,  I was feeling a tad bit more confident now and decided that I will try a lunch recipe, chicken wings……..I don’t eat them often but I am OBSESSED with lemon pepper wings from Wing Stop!!!!!  So, this seemed like a formidable challenge…..The recipe says it only takes 9 minutes to cook wings….of course what some don’t tell you is that you do have to wait for the Instant Pot to “warm up” but that took less than 5 minutes and all I did was pat dry the thawed frozen wings, put salt and pepper on them and put them in the pot with 1/2 cup of broth…..  The Pot said “ready” and we were off to the races…..  Sure as the Cowboys won’t make the playoffs in the very near future (Sorry Cowboys!) in 9minutes we had fall of the bone, fully cooked wings…..I prefer them a little crispier so once I removed them from the Pot, I put them on a baking sheet and turned on the broiler to high.  After 5 or or so minutes, I tossed the wings in the sauce and had the MOST AMAZING wings!!!!!!

I really, really wish I had a picture of the finished product but we ate them so fast that it didn’t even occur to me until 5 minutes after I had licked the plate clean of all of the lemon pepper and butter sauce that I messed up but I  am hard pressed to say that I am sorry because they were just that good!!!!!!

Now….on to the next “task”….I am using the bones, some carrots, celery, onion and herbs and going to put the Instant Pot on “slow cooker” mode and make chicken broth to use on another future adventure……stay tuned!!!!

Be  safe out there and be kind to one another!!!!!!!

DISCLAIMER
There are affiliate links in this blog so if you click on them and make a purchase, then yes, I make a little moo-lah on the side 🙂  Thank you!!!

What’s in a name??

When this brain child I am calling my “therapy through blogging i.e. Being Janet” was born, I asked several important people in my life to help me name this blog.  Not sure what this says about them or ME for that matter but these were the suggestions I got……The names of those suggesting have been changed to protect the innocent…..No, not really 🙂

  • Brannon (Introduction – My 2nd son, 26 yo recent college graduate, intern at an architecture firm, and if people wore there “identity” on their forehead his would say HIPPY. He lives his life his own way but with the principals of love and peace for all.)  “Fun with the Fundlings”
  • Brannon – “Scanet” – Get it??  Brangelina = Brad and Angelina….Scanet= Scott and Janet…..I know we aren’t in the same category as Brad and Angelina but doesn’t it count if I believe it in my head??  Guess not…….
  • Brannon – “Team ramrod”  Brannon, where did that come from???  Does some need a time out?
  • Kevin (Introduction – One of my favorite co-workers and a really great friend!!!  He is cajun to the bone ((including cooking road kill)) but he is the sweetest, most generous husband and father to his family….simply said, he makes me smile) – “The Can’t get rights”  OK, so he may be sweet but he can also be a pain in my back side…..Really Kevin??  At least I know where the Alamo is!!!  (will explain at a later date)
  • Kevin – “Batshitcrazy Entertainment” -This was a SERIOUS consideration!!!!   My favorite phrase is “Bat Shit Crazy” I mean,  have you met me??  Do you know where I work?? – Bat Shit Crazy sums up my life, hence “Therapy through blogging i.e. Being Janet”
  • Jim (Introduction – My favorite-est brother in-law….He MIGHT be my only one but he is still my favorite-est!!!!!  He loves my sister and takes such good care of her and that means the world to me!)  “Estrogen Dominance in a Testerone World!” – Totally summarizes my world……..
  • Christopher (Introduction –  My 1st son, 30 yo and I SWEAR I had him when I was 9……..It’s the truth……sort of…..you aren’t buying it are you???  Anyhoo……, He is my “rocker dude” who is engaged to the most beautiful woman and what makes him Christopher is that he wears his emotions on his sleeve.  He loves deeply and feels deeply and you will always know where you stand with him.  He is smart and has the most wicked sense of humor….I know, I am gushing but he is just that amazing!!!!)  – “Tomato Potato” – This one REALLY made me smile!  It’s an inside joke with his fiance and I may or may not write about it someday but know that he totally celebrates individuality/diversity  and makes things perfect and his own.
  • Brannon – “BankHead Bitches”  I assure you there will be MANY blogs dedicated to Bankhead and all that it stands for us…….
  •  Kevin – “Pray for Scott” – He is still a pain in my backside…..How about pray for me???
  • Jim – Need Recipe, Have Family!
  • Jim – WTF?  Drowning in Testosterone!
  • Jim – Here’s Your Answer!  What’s Your Question?

I am a firm believer that if you ask your family for suggestions then they will reveal who you are to them…..Sounds like I may need therapy or at the very  least day drink…….I do however feel like each “suggestion” is an upcoming blog post so stay tuned…….

Take care of yourself, each other and BE SAFE!  XOXOXO

 

Hash House a Go Go….

http://www.hashhouseagogo.com

I could end the blog here and those that have been there would get it but don’t worry, I won’t :))))

I rarely read reviews on yelp, yellow pages, or the like because I believe that there are many  types of reviewers but I will give you my TOP 3……I absolutely take friends and family’s advice on places to go but in the end, I would rather make up my own mind………Which “reviewer” are you?

1.) “1st reviewer”  –  never, never, never trust the 1st 2 reviews of ANYTHING!!!!!  Places/things/restaurants need reviews to get patrons but until somebody other than the “1st reviewer” goes they can’t get REAL reviews.  So, without a doubt the 1st 2 reviews for a new place HAS to be their mom/grandma or aunt…….

“We arrived and were instantly greeted by this handsome man who looks just like his mom, uhhhh….. I mean he was just handsome.  We ordered the sushi served table side and when it arrived there was broken glass all over it. I thought it was slightly odd but the broken glass added a crunchy texture to the otherwise brilliantly prepared raw fish by my handsome son….I mean by Beauregard”

2.)  The “ex” reviewer – This reviewer doesn’t care anything about the ambiance, food or anything else, they just want their “ex-boyfriend/girlfriend” to know that they are happy without them……

“The sushi was average at best but what made this place amazing was my other half got down on one knee in front of everyone else there (despite the fact that it was only our 2nd date) and sang Bruno Mar’s song “I think I want to marry you”….Some said that they heard dogs howling but I am certain they are just jealous that I was the center of attention……Would maybe go back…..”

3.) The “nothing is ever going to be right” reviewer…….We all have at least one of these family members or friends in our lives.  You may not openly admit it but you know you do……

“I went to my son’s restaurant last night and despite the fact that I loaned him almost 20 thousand dollars for this risky (never going to work restaurant) the parking was terrible!!!!!  We couldn’t park in the front space because of some silly handicap law but thankfully we got the space right next to it…..we still had to walk further to the door, but we made it inside.  We weren’t greeted in the first 2 seconds but were seated fairly quickly at the chef’s table. (The server said something about my son wanting to make sure no one heard me.  Well I’m pretty sure he said that my son wanted me to be close to him so that he could hear me but whatever)  The fish was raw and the rice was sticky….there was something green and grassy tasting and I could swear that the table behind us said it was “seaweed” but I am sure that my son wouldn’t serve that……I raised him better than that”

There are many more types but I am about to violate my promise to myself to not be long-winded so with all of that said, I will leave you with my review and you can decide which kind of reviewer I am 🙂

I have heard that Hash House A Go Go is normally VERY busy so we went today (Friday) at around 10:30am (after we picked Jeremy up from work) and there were a few people in there but we basically had the area we were in to ourselves.  I ordered the chicken and waffles with fried leeks (and maybe a house mimosa – C’Mon – you know you are into day drinking too).  Scott ordered the 2 egg breakfast with a pancake and Jeremy ordered the grilled cheese.  To say that the portions are HUGE is an understatement….They literally could feed a family of 5 but the chicken and waffle was REALLY REALLY good!!  The chicken has to be soaked in buttermilk because it was moist and yet crispy at the same time and the waffles were crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside…..fluffy pillows of goodness…..the syrup was pure maple goodness and the bacon….well what can I say?  Bacon makes everything better…..long story short?  I would absolutely recommend this restaurant if you haven’t eaten in approximately 5 days and even if you have….It is WELL worth the time!!!!

 

 

People have told me……

People have told me throughout the better part of my adult life that I should write a book because my life is crazy……….I am pretty sure they mean “certifiable long white jacket that ties in the back CRAZY” but after a really long road trip and LOTS of time to think, I decided I would write a blog.  If you have read this far then pat yourself on the back because I am pretty sure no one else has made it to the point 🙂

So, what makes my life so crazy??  I’m not really sure…..I have the “luck of the irish” (look it up on Wikipedia and that will tell you a LOT about me and I am not referring to the gold part of that equation), I have a FREAKISHLY large dysfunctional family that absolutely puts the FUN in dysfunction and perhaps a few relatives (by marriage doesn’t count right??) in prison, I LOVE food and consequently it loves me back to the tune of 25 extra pounds, I have 5 amazing boys (3 of which I raised and 2 that are a part of this crazy town) and I was lucky enough to marry the man of my dreams 2 weeks ago yesterday…….

The last few years have been a doozy but this year especially has so many POSITIVE changes that have already happened and a couple more that are guaranteed to get another relative or 2 thrown in prison but also will make me the happiest woman ALIVE (and for the love of all that is Holy, NO!  I am not pregnant)….This year promises to be the wackiest and most incredible journey that I am going to be on and if you are reading this and I know you then count yourself as someone who I carry around in my heart ALL of the time.  If I don’t know you personally and you are reading this then take a moment, bow your head and thank Google and/or the WordPress Gods for directing you my way.

It is my goal to share my heart, mind and soul with you and also share some of the things that I love.  As I said before, I LOVE food, I LOVE my family and I LOVE my life.  I will get into WAY more detail with each blog……Can’t share anymore or this blog will be over before it gets started……more to come soon!

Take care of yourself, each other and BE SAFE!  XOXOXO